How Much More lonely can a women feel?

I am not sure where to start.i feel in a vulnerable place, but with heartache anything can happen.  We resort to the most unconventional places , where trying is no longer relevant.  It's been almost a decade . You would think think that after that long someone would know you good by now? Or is this just my belief? You see no relationship is perfect , no friendship is perfect, no marriage is perfect, and just like other scenarios nothing is perfect. But at what point do we stop trying? ,  When do we just give up ?   After hope and faith has vanished for that person, when can we turn and walk away? All these feelings all balled up in a knot , why?  These are thoughts  and feelings of a  mothers emotional struggle. You know sometimes we forget to be whole. In my experience i've forgotten who i am as a person. because i have others who so depend on me that i just don't know how to let things be about me , till this very moment , this instant . See, when it's all said and done and after i've written this chapter of my life , i will leave my body into an abyss. i would feel like maybe this is what i am meant to  be.. but by the time this actually happens i would have been sad and lonely on the inside. i quiet my head so that it doesn't speak anymore than it has too. And, yet i can't shake off this feeling of loneliness. I once heard  a quote from robin williams that goes " i used to think that the worst thing was to end up alone. it's not. the worst thing in life is to end up with people who make you feel alone".  This is powerful. Words are harsh yet so deep. But so is physical acknowledgment. The day you stop showing someone you care is the day you stop feeling it . Not everyone is all about the whole mushy love thing,  and hey i agree , but when you give that person your  all ,  your world and in return they don't show you appreciation and neglects your existence that  ,  is where life changes.  I believe that no one should ever make us feel lonely , but what if you've created this life that involves other human beings , what is a mother too do?

after all  is said and years of fighting over the same thing how can one find hope and faith again ?

this is where my belief is that there is no real fairy tale, love is hard, hard ,hard work, and if one isn't willing or just gives you a mediocre reason  not to change , how is something suppose to change ?

I know that at then end of it all , and speaking as a mother Im starting to feel like my feelings just don't matter anymore. That i have too be willing too suck it up  for the sake of my children even though i hurt inside..... and as i fight my heart and thoughts how do put on a straight face...i know all this is arbitrary,  as we do with all things in life , but how can we change what might not be changeable? how does one face it head on ??

gimme your thoughts..